Week 17 Picks: 0-for-the 2nd Half of the Season (@mspici)

Jets +3

Titans -2

Ravens -1.5

Record: 19-25-4

Nice Life

I used this fork for four bites. Then I threw it out. That's how much this fork sucked at its job. Just couldn't handle being used on food. So I got thinking, how much time did it take to go through the process of making the fork, packing the fork, shipping the fork, then waiting for the pack of forks this fork was in to be finally opened by the vendor and put on the counter, then waiting as his fork friends were picked up and put into bags to fulfill their dreams, then finally getting picked to be put in my bag and used by ME - the lover of all plastic utensils! He went to the guy who when he's at home refuses regular silverware just to use plastic because it doesn't make that scratchy noise on the plate and doesn't hurt when it accidentally hits my teeth, couldn't of been a better situation for this fork.... But it couldn't handle it. All the time spent waiting and waiting to be used, and it got through four bites. And because I'm straight and symmetrical like a boss I can only do things in even numbers, so he's lucky he got to four, because he should've been tossed at three. Must've taken months to finally get called upon, then four bites later he's in the trash. Pretty sad.

Response to Swag’s Predictions

-These have to be the most boring Eastern Conference predictions of all time. You have all eight teams that made the playoffs last year making it again, and in almost the identical order. Creativity is way down.

-Miami vs Oklahoma City? Every major sports site has made that same prediction (which means it won’t be right but that’s another story). I would like someone to explain why it’s assumed the Thunder are going to the Finals. KD and Westbrook are superstars, but look at the Western Conference, and other leading contenders have two superstars: Pau / Kobe, Griffin / Paul, Manu / Duncan (he’s old but still great).  Their coach looks like an idiot and judging by what people say about him, that seems pretty accurate. They have a bunch of role players (Harden, Ibaka, Perkins, Sefolosha) that don’t scare anyone on offense. They are good, but I don’t know why everyone is handing them the West.

-I really like the “honorable mention” part.  Of the 15 teams in the Western Conference, you identified 11 that could make the playoffs. I think you should have included the other four teams too so you can say you were right no matter who the eight playoff teams are.  In total, you think 21 of the 30 teams could make the playoffs this year. Really going out on a limb there.

-I did not forget about Orlando being in the NBA. I don’t think their team is good, and my guess was that Dwight Howard gets traded to the JayZ’s.

-The Nuggets: I’m looking forward to watching this team. I think they are the best team in the West, and you don’t think they’ll even make the playoffs (you do have them in one of the honorable mention slots). Nene will hold down the fort at Center. The PG combo of Lawson and Andre Miller will be great. Danilo fits in perfectly on the run’n’gun squad. Afflalo plays lockdown D and hits open shots. They go at least 10 deep, and Timo Mozgov is a fine backup center. The fact that Kosta Koufos is getting some burn does have me concerned, but I did not foresee that before the season started.

-The Pacers: Indiana has very solid players at every position: PG (Collison), SG (George who is a 6’10 stud), SF (Granger), PF (West), and C (Hibbert) before you factor in the bench (Hansborough, Hill, Foster). Plus, they still have money to spend so they might be able to pick up another piece at the deadline.

Editors Note: Didn't feel like putting up another post just to blast the other guys picks and make fun of him because I realized my picks were made in dreamland and his were based in the real world. But hey my bad about the Honorable Mention part - I thought those were the teams that could scratch, claw and fight for that 8th spot, that's why I had the Nuggets there. If I knew it was a big joke I would've put them first too. Not my problem the NBA has 92% of the league make the playoffs.

NBA (Pre?)Season Predictions

So Mike decided to post his season prediction/preview on his own site and not this one which is kind of weird considering all we do is basically bullshit about sports like we know what we're talking about, and since he went 0 for the second half of the NFL season on picks I figure his predictions would fit right in here, but I guess I'll go at it alone.... And unlike Mike and his huge balls for picking the Nuggets first in the West, I'm not doing that.

Eastern Conference (Mike's picks in italic and parenthesis)

1) Chicago (Miami)
2) Miami (Indiana)
3) New York (New York)
4) Boston (Chicago)
5) Orlando (Boston)
6) Atlanta (Philly)
7) Philadelphia (Atlanta)
8) Indiana (New Jersey)

Honorable Mentions: Milwaukee, New Jersey

Western Conference

1) Oklahoma City (Denver)
2) Dallas (LA Clippers)
3) LA Clippers (Dallas)
4) LA Lakers (Oklahoma City)
5) San Antonio (Memphis)
6) Portland (San Antonio)
7) Memphis (LA Lakers)
8) New Orleans (Portland)

Honorable Mentions: Denver, Golden State, Minnesota

NBA Finals: Oklahoma City over Miami (KD vs. LB wow - 99% wishful thinking, 1% is with the Knicks making it)

MVP: Carmello Anthony (New York)

ROY: Alec Burks (Utah)

Few things about this - myself and Mike obviously have different views on some teams, and I think that's the only way to look at it. There's a black and white side with no grey area when you look at some of the teams across the league, you're either on one side or the other.

People either think New Orleans is going to absolutely tank without CP3, or they're going to be alright with Eric Gordon and the crop of talent the Hornets got in return. I think they'll be alright, they weren't all that great to begin with but I can see them pushing for a playoff spot at the end of the season in like 2 weeks.

I personally don't think signing David West makes Indiana a top two seed in the east, no way that team goes from 37-45 to a 50 win team (project a regular 82 game schedule), I can't see him making much of a difference. I do like Roy Hibbert, but rumors are out that they're going to be shopping Granger by seasons end (or trade-deadline-end) - If that happens I think it would just paralyze the team for a few weeks adjusting to a new look, which they don't have time for this season.

The Denver finishing first in the Western Conference thing... Honestly have no clue why anyone likes this team. A third of their starting lineup was starting for the 2010 NY Knicks, but not the good ones. Gallinari is one of the streakiest players in the league, and Timofey Mozgov is still looking to reattach his balls after Blake Griffin stomped on them. Nene is solid, but getting older and if this is who they're relying on that's nuts. Afflalo is getting better but still, is this the guy that replaces Melo's scoring? Ty Lawson is a solid PG, but this team is a complete 180 from a year ago. If there are concerns the Knicks need time to gel, the concerns HAVE to be there for the Nuggets. JR Smith, Wilson Chandler and Kenyon Martin are in China and contractually unable to sign an NBA deal until their Chinese team finishes its season (earliest being Feb. 15th, latest March 28th). Good luck.

Orlando still plays in the Eastern Conference. They're making the playoffs. I'm not going to insult Mike, I just honestly think he forgot to put them there. Even if D12 gets moved, they have enough to survive the likes of Milwaukee and New Jersey. Unless he goes to New Jersey.

Week 16 Picks: Need to Go Undefeated to Finish Above .500 (@mspici)

Chargers +1
Cowboys -1
49ers -2

Record: 19-23-3

SUCKER FREE SUNDAY: WEEK 16 PICKS

Gotta do this fast because it's 12:45 and right now I have maybe 1 sure pick in my head, but I just thought of two more so here we go:

Philadelphia +1 - The team is hot right now, and with the Cowboys and Giants looking like pure shit, they actually might win the division when they win the next two games. Fuck it hurt to write that.

Denver -2.5 - Tebow isn't wearing sleeves in Buffalo, God's son doesn't lose.

San Diego +1.5 - Typical Chargers, making an inexplainable run to win the division. They need this game, Detroit is slipping, their defense can't match up with Rivers and V Jax when they're hot.

2011 Record: 22-18-2

WC Picks (Record: 9-11):

Seattle +1.5 - SF has nothing to play for at this point, Marshawn Lynch will get the first rushing TD against SF this year.

NY Giants +3 - Just praying for a shootout, really is the Giants only hope is if this game becomes a barnburner. They need to admit they're a passing first team this year, please just don't try and run/run/pass. Pass all day, Nicks needs to come up big on Revis.

Week 16 Picks by Johny Galt

Buff + 3

Detroit - 2

SF - 1.5

Merry Christmas. Happy Holidays

Record 20-11-2