Tuesday, October 4, 2011

Get A Load Of This Asshole Who Bought A Rock In The Middle Of Nowhere That's Covered In Shit

It may be called "Rat Island," but it's a thing of beauty to Alex Schibli. After spending years gazing from his City Island backyard at the small island jutting out of the water, Schibli has just become the ruler of all he surveys. He bought the small island at auction for $160,000. How long did he stare out at the island and admire it? "Oh every day. Every day," Schibli said. "I wanted to buy the island to protect it…that is doesn't get into wrong hands. That I don't lose it as my recreation place." The small island, which is almost completely submerged at high tide, is mostly rocky, and is littered with thousands of mussel shells among the rocks and some small patches of grass. "I'd like to have it as it is. That I can still go out there, take people out there. I might put a sign out there that it's a private island and that they should respect nature," he said. As for the current name of the island, Schibli thinks it's quite "stupid." He says he's considering renaming the Island after his 5-year-old granddaughter, Malina. "There are definitely no rats out there, it's a stupid name — Rat Island. I don't know if it's possible to re-name the island. I don't know," he said.

Is this guy fucking kidding me? He might put a sign out there saying respect nature? You know that's a great idea because it'll probably keep away all those kids who hang out there at night, who decide at 1am to hop on their boats and kayak out to an island that's barely sticking out of the water and throw their cigarette butts on there then paddle back to hit McDonald's. What can you possibly do with this piece of shit island that has a couple patches of grass and is filled with mussel shells that hurt like shit when you step on them? Can't build a fuckin thing on it, can't raise the thing so it doesn't go under water during high tide - I mean what the hell is that thing worth $160,000 dollars for?? He wanted to buy it so it didn't end up in the wrong hands? Well I'm pretty sure you're the biggest asshole who could've bought this thing. Every reason he gives for wanting the island is such a pompous dickhead response. "I'd like to have it as it is" really? You paid $160 thousand just so you could look out of your shit hole window at a rock in the water? For $160,000 I'd be debt free sitting front row at every Giants game, rolling up in a stretch Benz tailgating the shit out of the stadium. Just so many more important and useful ways to spend that kind of money than some stupid rock no one will ever get any use from now that you're slapping "private" signs all over it you loser.

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