Wednesday, December 14, 2011

BREAKING: Hipsters And Nerds Don't Like Facebook

Yahoo Finance - Erika Gable, 29, who lives in Brooklyn and does public relations for restaurants, never understood the appeal of Facebook in the first place. She says the daily chatter that flows through the site — updates about bad hair days and pictures from dinner — is virtual clutter she doesn’t need in her life. “If I want to see my fifth cousin’s second baby, I’ll call them,” she said with a laugh. Ms. Gable is not a Luddite. She has an iPhone and sometimes uses Twitter. But when it comes to creating a profile on the world’s biggest social network, her tolerance reaches its limits. “I remember having MySpace for a bit and always feeling so weird about seeing other people’s stuff all the time,” she said. “I’m not into it.” Will Brennan, a 26-year-old Brooklyn resident, said he had “heard too many horror stories” about the privacy pitfalls of Facebook. But he said friends are not always sympathetic to his anti-social-media stance. “I get asked to sign up at least twice a month,” said Mr. Brennan. “I get harangued for ruining their plans by not being on Facebook.” And whether there is haranguing involved or not, the rebels say their no-Facebook status tends to be a hot topic of conversation — much as a decision not to own a television might have been in an earlier media era.

Tyson Balcomb quit Facebook after a chance encounter on an elevator. He found himself standing next to a woman he had never met — yet through Facebook he knew what her older brother looked like, that she was from a tiny island off the coast of Washington and that she had recently visited the Space Needle in Seattle. “I knew all these things about her, but I’d never even talked to her,” said Mr. Balcomb, a pre-med student in Oregon who had some real-life friends in common with the woman. “At that point I thought, maybe this is a little unhealthy.”

You know what type of people who don't do anything that makes sense by purposely going against society and normalcy who wear fingerless arm gloves and don't shower for weeks and live in Brooklyn? Fucking hipsters. No shit you interviewed two people in their 20s from Brooklyn who think Facebook is dumb. Then you go and interview a pre-med student. Give me a break, who didn't know this already? Nerds and hipsters never fit into society, why would Facebook change that? Look Facebook is a billion dollar company and a huge historical footprint on our generation and all that, but even that can't change millions of years of weirdo DNA, weirdo's are gonna be weirdo's no matter what comes along. Sure we landed on the moon, but there's still weirdo's being weird. The Red Sox finally won a World Series? Holy shit! But there's still weirdo's being weirdo's around here. Monumental overacheivements and miracles and unexplainable events can't snap the hipsters out of it - if anything it makes shit worse. Just more things they're unimpressed by.

Meanwhile, this pre-med geek kidding me? You thought Facebook was the reason for that unhealthy feeling? No that's the feeling of you realizing you're stalking the SHIT out of a complete stranger because you drool over her every day you closet case serial rapist. Stop stalking Facebook profiles LIKE A CREEP and surf it on over to YouPorn, 10x less creepy and much more normal... Right?

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